Around the Bluhmin’ Town

By

Judy Bluhm

Our struggles are real. Have you had trouble trying to open anything up lately? Hmm, I thought so. Armed with sharp knives, scissors, and other assorted pointy (and potentially lethal) objects; I am ready to rumble with any packaged item that comes my way. From opening bottles of iced tea to a new container of yogurt, the consumer better be physically fit to get through the tight layers of plastic, cemented bottle tops, steel-like cardboard, and other major obstacles.

We’ve all heard the stories about the elderly people who can no longer open their pill bottles because of the manufacturer’s “baby-proofing.” Let’s see, a drug designed for arthritic hands requires a vice to open. What’s wrong with this picture? I lift weights just to prepare unscrew bottle or jar caps. Sometimes these tasks require Herculean strength.

Physicians claim that elderly patients often don’t take their meds correctly because the hassle of getting things open is just too hard. One eighty- year- old man told his doctor, “It would take a body-builder to open up my heart medication bottle.” It’s not just an “elderly problem.” It seems that the average person can barely muster up the strength to open a jar of food or a pill bottle.

Clearly, our safety-minded packaging has gone too far! The other day I tried to rip open a package of cheese where it reads, “tear here.” Oh yeah, that is the first lie. Don’t believe it. Anytime you see those two little words – “tear here” – you might as grab your scissors.

Difficult-to-open packages frequently cause “wrap rage,” which is a phenomenon of extreme frustration. The worst offenders are blister packs, which are common for batteries or small electronics. Yep, tough PVC plastic covering cardboard is the worst. Then there are vacuum sealed meats and dairy which stubbornly refuse to be peeled off easily. Then there are hermetically sealed and crimped cartons which are melted edged plastic containers. Good luck.

I have a daughter with a disability and her struggles are real. If you have a slight vision problem (can’t line up those little marks on the child-proof bottle caps) or have poor hand coordination some day-to-day tasks become almost impossible. Worse, people are inadvertently stabbing themselves when they try to cut those plastic bottle-top rings with sharp knives. Ouch! It’s a bloody mess in the kitchen these days.

My most trusted item in the kitchen is the bottle grip-opener, yet most of the time, I still could use help. The other day I was fighting with an evil, little olive jar when I decided that sometimes the challenge is just not worth it. Who needs olives? They are not an essential food group.

Sometimes I walk around the house armed. If you stop by, don’t be frightened if you see me with a knife (cutting plastic rings), hemostat (gripping plastic), scissors (cutting cardboard), or wire-cutters (snipping steel staples). Does any of it work? Occasionally. Olive jar – beware! I’m coming for you.

Until next week, stay safe, Dear Readers and try to conquer all stubborn obstacles in your path.

Judy Bluhm is a writer and a local realtor. Contact Judy at [email protected]or visit www.aroundthebluhmintown.com.